Someone to Hold Your Hand

Painting by Claude Bernard

The day after I was diagnosed with prostate cancer, I did something strange.

I got a manicure — the first I’d had since I was a boy in my Aunt Shirley’s beauty shop.

Leaving our ailing beagle resting at home, I stopped by the public library to renew my card, borrowing a Harlan Corben mystery and buying a handful of magazines — Esquire, AD, Veranda — for a dime each.

Then I went to Walmart to pick up some fresh bread for the birds and squirrels at our “feeding oak.” 

I looked around at all the people gliding through the store, many of whom seemed only half alive, and thought about all the times I’ve only been half-alive too.

But now, at this moment, I was sharply aware of being alive. The consciousness of your own mortality can do that for you.

Passing the nail salon, I thought of all the times I had idly considered getting a manicure, but rejected the notion as being silly. I didn’t even know what one cost.

I strolled in.

Sixteen dollars.

Not too bad.

Why not?

A middle-aged Asian fellow dropped my hands into a bowl to soak, firmly, efficiently. Cuticle trimming, filing, buffing, all pleasant and relaxing.

My hands haven’t looked so good since some previous century.

Biden Ends a War Meant to Be Endless

Pity the poor Pentagon. 

They thought they’d finally achieved it: permanent war against an unidentifiable, invisible and endless “enemy.” Untold trillions spent, progress never measured, nothing ever won. It’s the lifelong wet dream of the American military-industrial complex.

Remember, for a full fifth of a century, the bought-and-paid-for corporate news media were utterly indifferent toward the endless, pointless draining of taxpayer trillions into the sands of Afghanistan. 

But now that Biden has ended it, they’re “outraged.”

Of course, the messy job of getting us out of Afghanistan would never have fallen to Biden if the GOP war criminals Bush and Cheney hadn’t decided to invade and occupy the country in order to distract attention from their terrorist pals in Saudi Arabia. But that’s of no interest at all to the corporate news tools.

The U.S. bombed Afghan civilians to bits for 20 years, with nary a peep from the news media. Suddenly they weep lest a sparrow fall in Afghanistan.

In fact, Joe Biden is experiencing his own version of the “Dean Scream” — being condemned by an absurd media narrative that is relentlessly hammered home, day after day. 

That propaganda is why a majority of Americans wanted out of Afghanistan, yet now blame Biden for actually getting us out.

When Liberty Equals Death

 

The selfish and self-destructive refusal to be vaccinated in order to stop a global pandemic reveals the insanity dwelling at the bottom of the rabbit hole that is libertarianism.

The Strangely Selective Science of the GOP

Republicans may sneer at science in general, but they always remain eager to deploy its latest advances in service of those activities they truly value: Killing, torture, military invasion and police intimidation.

Oh, and they want to keep advanced medical technology for when they become seriously ill, revealing that they don't really believe in all the cant they spew about the healing powers of prayer.

It’s reason itself that the Republicans really and finally oppose. They’ve met their enemy, and it is sanity.

Flowing Past Fear

 

They say before entering the sea,

a river trembles with fear.

She looks back at the way

that she has travelled, from the peaks,

the mountains, the long winding road

which crosses forests and villages,

and sees in front of her such a vast ocean

that entering it doesn’t seem anything else

than having to disappear forever.

But there's no other way.

The river can’t go back.

No one can go back.

Going back is impossible in existence.

The river needs to take the risk

and to enter the ocean.

It's only when entering the ocean

that fear will disappear,

because it’s only then

that the river will know it’s not about

to disappear into the ocean,

but to become ocean.

---

Fear by Khalil Gibran

Being Alone With Your Possibilities

“The ultimate test for the ability to control the quality of experience is what a person does in solitude, with no external demands to give structure to attention,” wrote Hungarian psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi in his book Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience.

“It is relatively easy to become involved with a job, to enjoy the company of friends, to be entertained in a theater or at a concert. But what happens when we are left to our own devices? Alone, when the dark night of the soul descends, are we forced into frantic attempts to distract the mind from its coming? Or are we able to take on activities that are not only enjoyable, but make the self grow?

“To fill free time with activities that require concentration, that increase skills, that lead to the development of the self, is not the same as killing time by watching television or taking recreational drugs. Although both strategies might be seen as different ways to coping with the same threat of chaos, as defenses against ontological anxiety, the former leads to growth, while the latter merely serves to keep the mind from unraveling. 

“A person who rarely gets bored, who does not constantly need a favorable external environment to enjoy the moment, has passed the test for having achieved a creative life.”

Sitting Alone With a Dying Dog

Sitting alone

With a dying dog,

His soft snores a respite

From his waking fears.

Warm to the touch,

Brave as a beagle,

Eyes a little haunted, as

The far-away nears.